On a recent Wednesday afternoon in Denver, my wif and I were trapped. The temperature had soared to 104 detrees, the Denver Art Museum was closed, and the Denver Botanic Gardens slammed its gates at 2 p.m. for a private event.
So our coolest options were eclipsed, and sun shone with actual malice.
In a panic, we ducked into a cavernous, shadowy building called a “movie theater.” It was devoid of people. Which is weird because they actually show movies in there! And the AC was sublime!
It made me wonder. Are there other cool spots and chill strategies we’re overlooking in our heat-stroked state?
Chill strategy No. 1
That awesome cheese emporium in Longmont, where the Camembert would run off with the brie, were it not for their refrigerated cases.
Chill strategy No. 2
The temperature dips 5 degrees for every 1,000 feet in elevation. Colorado is all about elevation! Drive uphill! And don’t come back down until October.
Chill strategy No. 3
The average low temperature in Denver at night is 30 degrees cooler than the average high during the day. Ipso facto: you need to become a nighthawk! Think of the cool denizens of the dark you’ll meet, in their frigid haunts!
Chill strategy No. 4
Now that the Safeway strike is over, you can inhabit a grocery store late into the night —guilt-free. They’re always too cold!
Chill strategy No. 5
You’re aware of the risk to dogs in hot cars. But where there’s risk, there’s opportunity as well.
Chill strategy No. 6
Enroll in driver’s ed. Job prospects galore, next winter!
